The CONSTITUTION
of the Madison Avenue Players
We the People of the Madison Avenue Players in Order to Have Fun, Put on Plays, Rule as Tyrants over persons in Drama, and secure the Blessings of Power to ourselves and future Drama Council Members, do Ordain and Establish this Constitution of the Madison Avenue Players.
All currently male positions shall be referred to as “he.” This is not an attempt to be discriminatory in any way.
All currently female positions shall be referred to as “she.” This is not an attempt to be discriminatory in any way. Except that it is.
Article I:
Section 1: All powers over the Madison Avenue Players herein granted shall be vested in a Drama Council, which shall consist of a Drama Council President and several appointed executives, chosen by the President.
Section 2: All decisions of the Drama Council shall be ordained by a vote among its members. Each person shall receive one vote. The President shall be counted as 20 persons, with three-fifths of a person counted for all other members.
Section 3: The Drama Council shall assemble no less than one but no more than eight thousand six hundred and two times for each Council. Each member of this Council is privileged to call a meeting of the Council, with the consent of the President. These meetings shall be presided over by the President and shall exist for the purpose of creating inside jokes, consuming food, making decisions, and acting upon these decisions. None other than said members may attend these meetings, except in cases of life-and-death.
Section 4: The Drama Council shall give direction to and govern over the Drama Council, and thus shall have power to direct the Drama Council to execute the directives of the Drama Council beforehand. This executive power shall also allow the option of monetary exemption in decided upon Madison Avenue Players (hereafter signified as MAPS) events.
Section 5: The responsibilities of the Drama Council shall herein be fivefold: to preside over the design, construction, and application of the current musical’s Homecoming float in September of that Council’s year; to advertise the times and seasons of all three dramatic productions of the school year and of the Drama Council’s dance, organized and applied by the same; to preside over the creation and execution of the annual Talent Show, which show this Drama Council is forbidden from participating in; to participate in the ticket-taking of all MAPS productions; and to organize MAPS socializing events as the Council sees fit. Other requirements and responsibilities given to the Drama Council must be voted upon by the same to apply.
Section 6: The Direction of the annual Winter Play, both the choosing and the presiding thereof, shall be given to no less than one but no more than two Directors, chosen by the Drama Titan. These Director(s) may come from the Drama Council or from senior persons of MAPS. The Drama Council must assist the Director(s) for the course of the Winter Play and, if necessary, are subject to them. The Directors shall be entitled to drinks.
Section 7: No member of the Drama Council aside from the President may be impeached except in cases of pre-meditated sabotage of the efforts of the Council, in which case the possibility will be slightly considered. All members of the Council may threaten to quit up to seven times, at which point they must begin to live up to their words.
Section 8: All Drama Councils shall be given a term of no more than 1 year, at which time a new Drama Council will be chosen. The current Drama Council will be dissolved and a new President chosen from the senior members of MAPS. Returning Drama Council members may be reappointed to another term, though they do not have to be.
Section 9: No other powers are vested in the Drama Council except by appeal to the Drama Titan.
Article II:
Section 1: The Drama Council President shall elected by the voice of the Drama Titan. This President may be chosen out of existing, returning Council members or out of the senior members of MAPS. He may then choose his Council as he sees fit.
Section 2: The powers of the President shall herein be universal and unlimited, as far as the power of the Council goes. He shall be strong and hold the Council together by his orders. He shall also be such a great guy.
Section 3: In his ruthlessness, all pictures of the President must show him with an angry complexion.
Section 4: The President shall be the voice of the Council and thus will receive all appeals to the Council for assistance. For and because of this, the President is herein required to delegate responsibilities to the other Council members in order to prevent his melting into a radioactive pile of goo.
Section 5: The President may be impeached by a unanimous vote of the other members of the Council, with the consent of the President.
Article III:
Section 1: The Drama Council Vice President (hereafter signified as DCVP) shall be appointed by choice of the President. She shall preside over functions of the Council in the President’s absence and shall replace the President if and when he goes mad.
Section 2: The DCVP shall be an honorable position, and thus all responsibilities of the Council shall not go to the DCVP.
Section 3: The DCVP shall preside over the State Drama function in early autumn of each term, unless she delegates the responsibility to another member of the Council. In presiding, she shall organize, announce, and plead in all manners relating to State Drama.
Section 4: The DCVP shall be entitled to mutiny and take over the Council no more than once.
Article IV:
Section 1: The Drama Council Secretary shall be appointed by choice of the President. She shall be the notebook keeper of the Council. She shall also be responsible for the Council’s collective health.
Section 2: The Secretary shall only be good for doing the President’s paperwork.
Section 3: The Secretary shall have the sole power and right of having Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder and of being stressed out of her mind. She is required to attempt to take away responsibility from the other Council members by heaping it upon herself.
Section 4: The Secretary shall make awkward inside jokes that cause concern to many uninvolved parties.
Article V:
Section 1: The Drama Council Historian shall be appointed by choice of the President. He shall be the record keeper of the Council.
Section 2: The Historian shall have the responsibility of taking and gathering pictures of all MAPS functions as he is hereupon able to. He must be present on the Facebook website and post these pictures. The Historian, under the direction of the Technical Representative, shall maintain the MAPS Facebook page.
Section 3: The Historian shall have all power over the MAPS Constitution and the amending thereof, under the specifications of Article IX.
Section 4: The Historian shall be required sometime during his term to engage in a “Historian Project,” a creation of significant value to the future members of the Council or of MAPS. No requirement for this project shall herein be constituted, other than that it shall and must be epic.
Article VI:
Section 1: The Drama Council Publicity Manager (hereafter signified as PM) shall be appointed by choice of the President. She shall handle all publicity of the Council.
Section 2: The PM shall oversee the design and creation of T-shirts and posters for MAPS events as well as other advertising concerns that apply to her being. She shall also assist wherever necessary and proper with other organization functions.
Section 3: The PM shall receive exactly one day out of her term to be designated as “Publicity Manager Day,” wherein the President must dedicate the entire day to the pleasure and enjoyment of the PM.
Article VII:
Section 1: The Drama Council Technical Representative (hereafter signified as TR) shall be appointed by choice of the President. He shall handle all technical ends of the Council.
Section 2: The TR shall be responsible for the creation and upkeep of a MAPS blog and shall oversee the upkeep of a MAPS Facebook page. All other internet services deemed necessary and proper by the Council shall be overseen by the TR.
Section 3: The TR must and shall handle freakin’ awesome sound equipment, under the direction of the owner of the same.
Article VIII:
Section 1: Supernatural creatures that interact in the MAPS setting shall be acknowledged by the Drama Council and have power over the same.
Section 2: The Drama God shall be chosen by subconscious voting of the current Council. For appointment to the Drama God position, these attributes will be taken into consideration:
Whether he has been a leading role in a MAPS production.
Whether he has been a member of the Drama Council.
Whether he has been a Director of the Winter Play.
Whether he is a constant presence among the Council that replaces him after his term is over.
Whether he is remembered constantly by members of MAPS.
The Drama God shall have no powers other than extreme influence over the Council’s decisions. In certain cases, there may be appointed more than one Drama God.
Section 3: The Ghost of the Auditorium (hereafter signified as G to the H) shall never be replaced. His presence shall be honored by the current Council, and every broken or flickering light, strange creak, or unexplainable occurrence shall without fail be attributed to him. G to the H shall reside both in the official MAPS auditorium and in the expired one, though he may spend a great amount of time in the latter.
Section 4: The Drama Titan (also known as Mr. Hibbard) shall have complete control over the doings and existence of the Council and can overrule any measure of this Constitution. He shall choose the President of every term and shall insist on consultation with every Council decision. He shall not be replaced except by resignation.
Article IX:
Section 1: The Amending of this Constitution shall be proposed by a member of the Council to the general assembly of the same. The Historian shall write the Amendment, and such Amendment shall be passed by a vote of 3/4 of the Historian. Amendments may include, but are not limited to, adding or taking away responsibilities, adding new positions that exist on future Councils, or including further inside jokes.
Section 2: Whereby Constitutional Amendments can reach alarming numbers, at such a time as the number of Amendments of this Constitution exceeds the number of thirty, this Constitution shall be rewritten to include the Amendments in its main body. The obsolete version must and shall be saved for future posterity.
Article X:
The Ratification of this Constitution of four Drama Council members, shall be sufficient for the Establishment of this Constitution between the members so ratifying the Same.
done by Drama Council Historian Peter Christman on September 22 in the Year of our Lord two thousand and ten. Ratified on October 20 in the Year of our Lord two thousand and ten by:
President:
Vice President:
Secretary:
Historian:
Publicity Manager:
Technical Representative:
Amendments
Amendment 1: No object shall be created by the Drama Council, except it shall be made of cardboard and paper, with a little bit of foam and duct tape thrown in.
Amendment 2: Only the Drama Council Historian is granted boon to the ascending of ladders for Council functions and purposes, and the falling off thereof.